If you want change, you need to open a window and begin to clean house. 5 tips !

I write this on a Monday morning, on peek week of my next powerlifting competition, this Saturday. I sit here amongst the disaster left behind in the kitchen and bedrooms from a week of fevers and sinus colds plaguing my family, of which, much to my fear, I got during one of the most crucial weeks of training. 

This morning, as I looked around my bedroom, at the dishes, kleenex, heating pads, and other "sickness" paraphernalia, I sat up and decided it's time to get up, shower up, open the windows, and clean up this mess.  Not only do my children need their mother to function today, I have goals that need to be accomplished this Saturday, of which sitting in bed, won't help me achieve. I don't just have the dishes to wash, I need to focus on renewing my strength, and my purpose in all aspects of my life. Sitting here feeling disappointed, defeated, and frustrated isn't going to accomplish anything. Time to get up and recoup what I can.

The first order of business is to open the windows. As I feel the rush of fresh air greet me, it revives my body and mind. The fresh feeling through the upstairs of a household previously sick, gives a sense of cleansing and vitality once again. Such a small act, yet the first step to renewal. 

As I begin to clean up the dishes, the clothes,  etc. My thoughts begin to whirl how so many people are stuck in the 'staleness' of their lifestyle and habits.  They sit in their figurative sick bed,  wanting change, they want fresh, to begin again, to clean up, yet can't seem to get up and take the first steps to opening the window, not realizing that this small beginning will not only refresh but encourage you to take on the next task and the next. 

If you're feeling stale, stuck, and wanting change
Here are 5 things to focus on:

Start with small steps and focus on the big rocks: 

I'm currently sitting down for lunch and writing a bit more after I've cleaned up the dishes and disaster upstairs. I started a load of bedding in the laundry, and vacuumed and mopped the floors. I can't focus on anything until the floors are clean. That's my 'Big Rocks". It's the task that matters the most to produce the most change. If the floors are not clean, I can't focus or accomplish anything else. It's the priority. I want to dust the 2 rooms I didn't get to last week, but I know, that's not a task for today. If I take on too much I'll become overwhelmed and exhausted, and tomorrow nothing will get done. 
So it is with a lifestyle change.

You don't need to figure it all out at once. So many people who want to take on a change go all or nothing. They want to eat 100% whole foods , remove carbs, remove dairy, gluten, broccoli, take 17 supplements, exercise 6 days a week, and solve world hunger all at once. They also want to do it with absolute perfection. This isn't sustainable. 
SLOW DOWN! 

In the world of social media, you'll be exposed to many guru's with no nutritional education. Theyll have you chasing everything at once, worried about what magical foods you're eating or not eating, what types of foods you're combining to create fat loss, and usually selling you a boat load of magical supplements to achieve your goals. While I have no issues with supplements for certain objectives, etc. They're missing the point. Most people spend hundreds of dollars on mythical quick fixes, or diet hacks in hopes of escaping dealing with the big rocks. Some of these things are small pebbles that may produce tiny bits of change, or absolute horse hockey, and you're being sold a diet myth. 

Big rocks are usually unsexy. Theyre boring and not magic. Big rocks take a bit to move, but they produce the most change. What is that in terms of change? Proper diet, including mostly unprocessed or minimally processed (think frozen vegetables) food, and moving your body regularly! Focus on sustainable steps and the things that will produce the best results FIRST before setting your entire world upside down and getting very little return on small pebbles and outright b.s.

Motivation comes and goes, It's discipline that you need to focus on, and it's a skill you need to practice

People think I'm motivated. Sometimes I have it, but if I'm honest, the entire prep for my upcoming competition has been built on discipline. I haven't been as enthusiastic about showing up for myself this time. I do it because I know the results will be worth it. I'll be proud of myself. I'll stand at that mountain top and be happy with my efforts. 

So many people are looking for motivation to get them started. Sorry to tell you, if you do have motivation to get started, I promise you, it's not going to keep you going. You'll need discipline for that. 
Like anything, discipline is a skill. You need to practice it over and over, the more you do it, the better you get. 
Motivation absolutely happens when you see results, but sometimes there are plateaus, sometimes there's sicknesses, sometimes things don't go your way. You need understand that it's not motivation you need to seek, but discipline you need to practice. 

You don't always want to clean the house, but you know the result of letting things go. You don't want to do the dishes but you know you'll have no plates come dinner time if you don't wash them. It's discipline to the task at hand in managing your family and life that drives you to clean up.  So it is with health and fitness. 

Discipline is your best friend. It will take care of you like nothing else can.

Attitude is everything! Focus on having a good one.

I know this will make me seem harsh, I do not mean it as such. Many of you need to drop the 'poor me' attitude.

Life kicks us all. If it hasn't yet, it's coming. You may need time to recoup, to breathe, and you may even have to forgive yourself for bad habits you've developed as a way to cope, but if you want change, you're going to have to realize this.... 
You may have been a victim, but you don't have to live that way forever. 

Sometimes, that means therapy, and supports. That's ok. Therapy is good! 

But I can tell you this. always identifying as the victim, Always saying you can't because you've chosen the identity of what happened to you, will leave you stuck. If you tell yourself you're too dumb, too clumsy, you have this imbalance or that syndrome, or that you're a victim of many life circumstances and you can't change, I assure you, nothing is going to happen. Whether you think you can or you think you can't , you are right!

I have my own story, life hasn't always been fun. I also have the most incredible clients and I've learned so much from them too. Often during a check-in or a one on one session,  I get to hear their stories. What they've been through and what brought them in. 

I've heard stories of tragic accidents, child loss, disability, sickness, etc. 
Each client decided one day they could  no longer 'live in bed surrounded by dishes, and got up and opened the window"

They took a step. They realized if they didn't heal they'd be stuck. So they took it day by day. and each small step lead to another. They practiced discipline, and even though some of their hurt they will carry forever, they also are able to see a healthy future. 

What does this have to do with health and fitness? 
1.) Eating well and exercise actually helps you have a healthy body and mind. It helps you carry your burdens easier. 
2.) Those that succeed decide they will work to be a victor over their story, not a victim. If you want to heal, you have to take steps to do so. Mentally, and physically. 

Grief, and feeling is ok. But a 'poor me' attitude on continuous repeat will leave you stuck. 

Proverbs 17:22  A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

Attitude can make or break you right from the get go. Decided to heal and grow. Open the window and breathe some fresh air and have some fresh thoughts. 


Focus on your why

Spinning off of the last point. 
Making change is hard. Changing attitude is hard! 

'With a big enough why you can overcome any how.'- James Clear

Let's go back to 2 points I made earlier. I have a why for getting up today and doing what I need to do. 
1.) My kids need me and my home needs to function
2.) I have goals for this weekend and want to see the view from the top of the mountain. 

Don't focus so much energy on the hard. Focus on the goal, and the why attached to it. 
Focus on your purpose! 

Don't listen to the outer or inner critics
 
This isn't so much about attitude to life circumstances that are out of your control, and more about what is in your control. 

You can decide what you tolerate from others, AND what you allow yourself to think.

Sometimes our critics are on the outside, sometimes the meanest of critics is the one between both your ears. 
Sometimes what is repeated by the outer critics over years is what is repeated internally. 

I have a few more external critics since succeeding in my goals over the years. 
I've had to really learn to focus on how people treat ne , who have been/are incredibly toxic to me, who stop me from achieving my goals and God given tasks in life, and how to keep a healthy distance.

I also have my own negative internal dialogues that I shut down often. Many are thoughts that have been repeated externally by individuals I've known since childhood. 

With reflection, therapy, and focus on the origin story of your thoughts you can also learn to rewire the negative internal thought patterns.

Be aware of how you are being treated. Be aware of how you are treating yourself.
Loving re-direction as well as internal self reflection isn't a bad thing, however be very careful around those who maliciously tear your down. make you feel insecure, unsafe, and unloved. 
Harsh criticisms internally and externally will tear you down. 
Take steps to protect yourself from the harmful external and to re-wire the harmful internal. 

Don't be afraid to look around at the 'stale air' surrounding you and decided to open a window and breath something a little more fresh. It can really kill your decisions to eat better and exercise when you have toxic internal and external things. Clean it out. Say 'no' to it. 

And so with these 5 tips, you can see your goals like cleaning a house

1. Focus on the big rocks first, they make the most change
2.Develop discipline, do what needs to be done 
3.Attitude is everything, decide to get up and do it
4. Focus on why you need to do it
5. Clean house from the negative things that make your house a mess.

Clean! 

Need a coach to help you on your path?

I'm a Certified Personal Trainer, Nutrition Coach (and have some other few fun athletic accolades) here to help you.

Check out my website www.thelionsdenfitness.ca 
Let's get started together!

Tamara